Breaking Free from People Pleasing: A Journey Toward Authenticity

Amy Stone [00:00:03]:
Devon, welcome to Imperfect Adulting.

Devon Adrianne [00:00:06]:
Hello. I’m excited to be here.

Amy Stone [00:00:09]:
Are you ready for a fun chat?

Devon Adrianne [00:00:11]:
Oh, yes, most definitely.

Amy Stone [00:00:13]:
Awesome. All right, so today, as you already know, because you’re the guest, we are going to talk about changing your career, changing your profession to match and support a life that you want for yourself. I think this is a conversation a lot of people are going to be interested in.

Devon Adrianne [00:00:32]:
This is a topic that I’m very, very passionate about. So I’m really excited to dive in.

Amy Stone [00:00:39]:
Awesome. All right, so let’s rewind time just a teeny tiny bit to before you made this change. Like, so before you were thinking about it, before you made the change. You are a photographer by trade. What did your life and business look like before you made this shift?

Devon Adrianne [00:00:59]:
Yeah, lots of hours out of the house shooting weddings and sessions. So weddings were kind of like the bigger. The bigger, longer days that would keep me kind of like away from my family and stuff, like all weekend. Rewind just a tiny bit more. And before I started photography, I was a waitress, so I always worked on the weekends and then went. I started my photography business while I was in the restaurant industry. And when I wasn’t serving tables on the weekends, I went straight into weddings. So I always worked on the weekends. And as my kids got older and got more into extracurricular activities and things like that, of course they had, you know, things that were scheduled on the weekends and I had to miss them. So I was working a lot. Just. I felt like I was just trading so much time for money, and I got just really burned out on it. I just really didn’t want to be away from everybody, like my children and my significant other all the time and the dogs and the house. And I just felt like it was. It was just taking away all the things that I really wanted to start my business to begin with because I wanted to own my time and be a more present mother. And next thing I knew, I was booking two, three weddings every weekend and gone all weekend. And then I was shooting in the evenings during the week to get that golden hour light as a photographer. So when the kids were home in the evenings and during the school week, I was missing out on time then, too. So it was just like a lot, a lot, a lot of work outside the house, which was kind of counterintuitive for why I became, you know, an entrepreneur in the first place, because I wanted to make my own schedule to be there for my family. So it kind of got to the point where I was just like, I Don’t know that this is really what I want to do. And do you want me to go into my pivotal moment yet or not yet?

Amy Stone [00:03:00]:
Let’s back up.

Devon Adrianne [00:03:01]:
Okay. Okay. I was like, I know you.

Amy Stone [00:03:03]:
This is a story about you, and, you know, your life story. But let’s back up just a teeny, tiny bit, and I’ll walk you through it for the listeners. So let’s talk a little bit about what your family looks like and who they are. So tell us as little or as much as you like about the people you live with. Your family, kids, partners, pets, where you live, stuff like that.

Devon Adrianne [00:03:25]:
Yes. So I feel like I’ve had a crazy journey in my. In my family life. I have two children.

Amy Stone [00:03:36]:
Okay.

Devon Adrianne [00:03:36]:
They are now 13 and 15, almost 16. So I always have to, like, slow down. Like, she’s not 16 yet, but 13 and 15. Rewind back to when I was younger. I had my first. When I was 22, she. I got pregnant with her, married her dad, and then we had our second. That marriage turned out to be not great. Um, and towards the end of that is when I decided, like, I was in just a really rough situation, like, with our family life and with, like, my. My husband at the time. And I was like, this is not how I want my future to look. Like, forever. I was, you know, serving tables. I had two. Two young children. I was like. I had my second when I was 24. I turned 25 right after he was born. So I was like, 25 with two young kids and serving tables in a bad marriage with a narcissistic, mentally abusive person. And I was like, something has to change. I have no. I had no experience in photography or in business or anything, but I was like, I always love photography. And I said, you know, I’m. I’m gonna. I’m gonna become a photographer. So I bought myself a little camera and ended up leaving my husband at the time and kind of going out into single parenthood for a couple years while serving tables and building my photography business, which was crazy, and I don’t know how I did it, and I don’t know how I’m still shooting 11 years later. But we. We managed to persevere, and there was, like, it was the only option. Like, I needed to build this business. I needed to make something more of my life and make more money and own more time and all the things.

Amy Stone [00:05:35]:
Okay, so that was actually. So you get two kids just came out, you’ve got two kids, you’ve been married, divorced, and it sounds like remarried.

Devon Adrianne [00:05:43]:
Well, I have a significant other now, but we’ve been together for a long time, but we’re not married.

Amy Stone [00:05:47]:
Okay, so new partner, then. The next thing I was going to ask you was about that. I actually talked to a lot of people who are photographers, and so I was going to talk to you about the way you chose that as a business, which you just talked about. One of the things that really surprised me as a young mom, so I was a stepmom, and then I was a mom. And one of the things that really surprised me in being the parent of a young mom is how professional life, like working for someone else really actually doesn’t fit into the family calendar. And I had known that as a. I had seen people struggle. Like, I had seen people make that decision in front of me. I just didn’t understand it until I was living it. Like, why everyone quits their job and takes up, like, an entrepreneurial. An entrepreneurial gig. So. But what were the things? Like, talk. Talk us quickly through. Like, what about. You said you love photography and you were drawn to entrepreneurship. Do you remember your thoughts about that? Like, what were the things that were driving you in that direction when you were in that spot? Was like, it has to work. It has to work, because what I’m doing now doesn’t work.

Devon Adrianne [00:06:53]:
Yeah. I don’t even know what necessarily drew me to photography. It was just a friend of mine was doing it as a hobby, and he was taking photos of my. My kids for me when they were little. And I just remember being, like, wanting to pose them differently or shoot differently. And I was like, wait, I. I could just do this myself. I think maybe I really didn’t know. I was. I felt like I was just. It was just almost like a pipe dream. And I was like, I mean, maybe I could be a photographer. I’ve always been a little creative. And I just was like, you know what? I’m gonna do it. And I put my mind to it, and I was just like, okay, I love photography, but that’s not really why I’m doing this. I feel like I’m doing this mainly because I want to work for myself. Because you’re right. Like, working for other people, having small children, and then even being a single mom with small children, it’s just. It’s not feasible. Like, when the kids get sick from school, like, you can’t just go pick them up, you know, because you’ve. You’re at a job, you’re at a work. You can’t just leave work and go get the K. So and.

Amy Stone [00:07:57]:
Or if there’s no school, like if they. Because when they’re little there’s only school. Like every third day it’s like today holiday again.

Devon Adrianne [00:08:06]:
A hundred percent. Yeah. I just was like, I. There were just things that I wanted as a mom too. Like I really wanted to be able to take them to school every day and pick them up from school every day. I didn’t want them riding the bus. Not anything against buses, but I wanted to be the one to tell them, I love you, goodbye every single morning. Like, have a good day. I wanted to be the first one that they talk to after school to be like, how was your day? Did anything interesting happen? Like, if they wanted to like divulge how their day was, I wanted to hear it like as soon as possible, as soon as they were excited to hear it. So that was like, I don’t know, just something that was really, really important to me. I think my kids and my relationship with them and how I wanted to raise them was really my driving factor in, like, why this had to work. Because I wanted to be at every, like in elementary school they had award ceremonies like every nine weeks or whatever. And my kids were always, or still are always very smart. So they always got presented with awards. And I wanted to be there to show up for them. And I knew if I was working at a restaurant or even a day job nine to five or whatever, I. There was no way I could get off for those, those moments and those days. So it was just really important to me to be as present as a mom as I could be and show up for all the things, especially since I knew that like, their dad was not going to be that person. So it was important that I showed up for me and for them in all the areas as much as possible. That was really my driving factor in, like, why this had to work. Plus, I mean, I went into the restaurant industry when I was like 18, 19 years old, like really young. And I got stuck into it. It’s good money. It can be good money. And if you’ve, if anybody’s been in the restaurant industry, they know that it’s like once you get in, it’s a little hard to get out because you kind of just get stuck into the cycle of making cash every day. So it was just like really hard. And I never really worked like an office type job. So when I went into the restaurant industry and then picked up photography, it was like, these are my only two skills. Like, I’m not, I can’t work a nine to five. Like, I’m not built that way. I’m not built to go into work at 8am and work until 5pm like, who would get the kids from school? Like, who? No one’s going to be there. You know, my extended family’s. They all work all the time. They’re not, like, super helpful. It was just me. Like, I had to do it all. So it’s like, I have to make my schedule, I have to make this work to make the life that I want to live and I want my.

Amy Stone [00:10:34]:
Kids to live very nice. Yeah. So people, like, often people’s drive as parents comes from one or two things. Either they had a similar experience they’re trying to recreate, or they had an opposite experience. And you just talked about your personal drive to be able to create the experience for your kids of somebody being there to ask them how their day was and knowing who was going to drive them to school and pick them up. Which of those two categories would you put yourself into that was what your childhood was like or it wasn’t? And so you were hoping to create something different.

Devon Adrianne [00:11:03]:
Oh, for sure. It was the opposite.

Amy Stone [00:11:05]:
Okay.

Devon Adrianne [00:11:07]:
Yeah, that was. That was not that. My, you know, my mom was a terrible mom, and my dad and my mom split up when I was really little, early elementary school years, and he had moved to Georgia for a little bit and then moved to Ohio. So, like, we saw my dad growing up, but it wasn’t a lot. We mainly lived with my mom, but she worked all the time. She was. I had two younger siblings that I would have to get up for school. I’d have to get myself up and get them up and get us up all ready to get to the bus in the morning by ourselves. So, like, I was almost like, I wasn’t the oldest. I had an older brother, but I was like that older child, like, Persona that had to do all, like, the taking care of the younger sibling vibes. Um, so I guess maybe that kind of. I took that with me into adulthood, but I also have very much been like, okay, my mom was this way. And not really, you know, because she wanted to be, maybe, but because that was just the life that was dealt to her.

Amy Stone [00:12:05]:
Yeah.

Devon Adrianne [00:12:06]:
But I did not. Like, I want to be completely opposite. Like, I find myself every day. Like, not that she was a bad mom, but it just. I don’t want to be like that. Like, I want to take the kids to school. I want to be there. I want to show up. I want to be interested in all their. Their hobbies. Their activities. Like my son and I, he’s 13, we’ve been mountain biking this year. And I am not an outdoorsy person at all. But I’m like, he’s a 13 year old boy. How else am I going to connect with him unless I start like liking some of the things that he likes, you know, so. And again, I would not be able to do that, you know, on a Tuesday afternoon and go mountain biking with him if I had a regular job. So.

Amy Stone [00:12:49]:
Thank you for sharing that. That was a personal question and I appreciate you going in there, but I think that that’s helpful for people to understand who are, who are in a similar situation now or in the future. So now, now let’s dig into. You’ve got a, you’ve got a business that you’re running that you love and it’s a photography business. And so this is client work. Photographers, the clients are available and weddings are not usually over a lunch hour sometimes, but not usually. They are Friday, Saturday, Sunday, the times that everything else happens. So you realize that your professional life is conflicting with your real life, home life. And what happens? What is the pivotal change that comes up that you’re like, I gotta shift.

Devon Adrianne [00:13:36]:
Yeah. Oh yeah. I remember this like it was yesterday. I’m sorry. The sun is like starting to poke out. So this video. But it was 2021. Well, I went full time in my business with photography. I was able to quit my restaurant job right at. I went full time in my business in 2019. Fall of 2019. 2020 hit. I was like, oh my goodness. Weddings were being canceled left and right. I thankfully had not had a ton of 2020 weddings, like really booked on my calendar. So I got really, really, really lucky because a lot of my wedding photographer friends were being like, I just happened to cancel contracts and push weddings and dates were just like going crazy. It was weird, it was wild, it was not good. But I spent that whole first half of 2020 just like helping anybody else that I could in the industry and just still like trying to book weddings for everybody that was scheduling their weddings for 2020 was pushing. And so they were like, well, you know, we need a new photographer because our photographers not available in 2021. So I got really lucky and I booked up my 2021 season, like the fullest and biggest that I’d ever had. I had tons of weddings in the fall. It was crazy. Now at this time, I also had the kids only during the week and their dad had them on the weekends. So that was our, that had been Our schedule, like, he had the weekends because I was shooting weddings on the weekends. Well, going into 2021, a lot of, like, personal drama happened with him, and I got the kids full time. So going into my busiest fall season in 2021, I went to having the kids only during the week to having them all the time, full time. And I had wedding upon wedding upon wedding, like back to back to back, all from like September to like, late November. Plus there was school. I mean, in the holiday season, anywhere from October to December is crazy with school and holidays and activities and this and that. And the kids were in late elementary school and middle school, so, like, social life was getting bigger. They were wanting to go out here and go there and do this and that. So my daughter was in volleyball also at the time, which was very time consuming. We. She had practiced three nights a week. And then Saturday mornings slash midday, she would have games and like, tournaments and stuff. My last, like, I survived going through the wedding season barely. I had to find, like, babysitters constantly because my significant other that I’m with now, he’s a restaurant manager, so he works crazy hours too. So the kids were having to stay with like, friends or my, my sister or whoever because I was like, I can’t leave them home alone. My son’s only like 10 for, you know, 12, 13 hours. Because I was at a wedding that was like an hour away. So it’s just crazy. And I was just getting really, really exhausted and missing stress on finding people to watch the kids, help me with the kids. And then like, also just being gone all the time was just very exhausting. And then having to worry about them and the situation that we were in personally. And I felt like I was getting back into, like, the whole, like, tied down to my job feeling that you have with like a 9 to 5 or the restaurant industry. Because I. With weddings, you can’t like, reschedule. You’re right. It’s. You’re locked in. Like with portrait sessions and family sessions, if something had come up, I could always, you know, text my client or message them, email them and be like, you know, something’s very important’s come up. Can we reschedule this family session? And usually they were okay with that, but with weddings, there was like, there was no rescheduling. So I felt very tied in, locked in.

Amy Stone [00:17:25]:
And then the.

Devon Adrianne [00:17:26]:
By the end of the season, I was so burnt out, so tired, so stressed. I had one last wedding. It was December, or I think it was December 6th. I remember it like it was Yesterday. And the wedding day was crazy. It fell way behind, and so I was already stressed. And that same day, my daughter had her first big volleyball tournament, and I had to miss it. And I was so heartbroken because I had to had that wedding booked a year in advance because people book so far out, so you have that day locked in. So whenever they, like, gave us the date for her tournament in November, I was like, well, I’m gonna miss it because I have a wedding, and I can’t reschedule that. I can’t be like, hey, my daughter’s got a tournament. It’s really important to me to be there for her. Can we, you know, can we push this wedding? Obviously, that’s not an option. So I had to miss the tournament. And she’s texting me the whole time that she’s there at the tournament, like, while I’m at the wedding. She’s like, we just won our first game. Like, we’re going on to the second round. We get to play again. And I’m like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, that’s so exciting. And then she’s like, oh, my God, I just played the best game I’ve ever played. I’m so sad you’re not here. And I’m, like, dying inside because I’m like, this is what. This is why I went into business for myself, so I could be there for these things and, like, celebrate with her and, like, watch her and support her, because, you know, she’s my life. She’s my wife, her and my son. So it was, like, so. So heartbroken. And, I mean, she ended up winning, like, second place, and she won. It was, like, her first trophy. She’s not really a sports kid, so, like, it was a big deal for her to, like, be in this tournament. And, like, when it was her first and only trophy that she’s ever won to the date, and she’s almost 16, and I. And I missed it. And at that point, like, I was like, I do not want to do weddings full time. Like, this is. I. It just, like, clicked. I was like, no, more like.

Amy Stone [00:19:19]:
So that’s December 2021. And so the pivotal event when you realize that this thing that you had built for yourself, to empower yourself and design your life was actually in conflict with the life that you wanted now. Right? So. So it has been 2021. It’s been three. Three full years. Yep. Three full years. You say to yourself, I don’t want to do any weddings anymore. So what did making this change actually look like for You. And how long did it take? Because you mentioned that people book weddings a year in advance. So walk us through a little bit about how. How that actually, like, one is making the decision in your mind, and then the next thing is actually making it happen. What did it look like and how did it. How did it.

Devon Adrianne [00:20:07]:
Yeah, I felt like at the end of 2021, I just, like, I hit a wall and I didn’t even, like, think about really. I just took, like, a big mental break for the rest of the year because that was early December. And then going into 2022, I actually. Well, that’s not true because I did advertise late 21, I advertised for my first CEO business retreat. I hosted a retreat for small business, like, owners. Like, a small little retreat here in Knoxville where I live. And, like, that kind of catapulted my coaching and, like, community building, like, passion. I’ve always been a helper. Like, I’ve always been somebody that wants to, like, give advice and coach and teach. I’m a type 2 on the enneagram, like, core, like, through and through to the core. So if anybody’s, like, have a problem, I’m like, let me see if I can help you. So I hosted this little retreat. It was like 13 of us. And I think that that was, like, a huge eye opener. Like, I loved it so much being able to help people. Like, one on one. We just covered, like, we had a whole weekend. We stayed in downtown Knoxville and we just, like, coached or I coached them on, like, topics of, like, money management. They were not all photographers. Some were wedding planners, some were florists, some were photographers. And so from there I just, like, was like, okay, this is what I want to do. I want to coach and help other women, small business owners and photographers, mainly because that was my. My industry and trade. So I knew mostly about that. I want to help them create their own rich life because I knew that that’s kind of what I had done and where. What my drive was. And I wanted to help other women get to that point as well.

Amy Stone [00:21:56]:
Very nice. Okay, so I didn’t realize that that was the part of the story because you are still working today as a photographer. So I didn’t realize that that was the direction that you took. So did you still work some weddings in 2022?

Devon Adrianne [00:22:09]:
Yes, I still had some because they had booked 2022 weddings had booked me in 21. So I still had a good handful throughout the year. 2021. And then I had two in 2023. No, I had a couple in 2023. I had two in the beginning of this year, 2024, and then actually just picked up one this past weekend. Just maybe, honestly, because they had some major family issues and their photographer bailed, so I had to take it. So I’m still kind of like doing a little bit here and there, but only when I feel like I can take on a wedding and whenever I know, like, there’s nothing going to be happening that month or whatever. And I will never, like, book my whole entire fall season up with like, you know, 20 weddings or anything crazy. I think I’ve just learned, okay, full time. This is not, for me, maybe five weddings a year, strategically placed. If an inquiry comes in and it’s like in February when there’s not really a lot going on, then yeah, yeah, maybe I could take it here and there because I do love it. It’s not that I don’t love weddings. It’s not that I don’t love photography. And I’m still photographing families. I have a lot, a lot of repeat families that I’ve been with for the past 11 years, and I still photograph them here and there. But it’s, it’s more on my own time. I feel like I have more of a control on it. And I’m really just focusing on trying to build the education side of my business and the coaching side of my business for new photographers, because that I can do during the day, during the school day, or on my own time, or it can be passive income or it can be online courses where it’s only like a bit here or a little bit there. So that’s, that’s the new goal for my business, is to take everything I’ve learned over the past 11 years, whether it’s just photography skills, editing skills, composition, everything in the technical side, but then also on the business side and also on the mindset and the burnout side and teach all of that to new photographers so they don’t get to the point where I had gotten to where I was like, hating everything that I had built for myself.

Amy Stone [00:24:16]:
Yeah, no, it does. It makes a lot of sense. So you don’t know this about me, but back in early 2000s, I owned a photo studio and did families and weddings. And I, I studied photography. So I knew, I used to. In college I earned beer money doing people’s weddings and just trading the film and stuff like that. But I knew how much work weddings were. And I used to sit down anytime people were like, hey, we’d like to do your wedding, I was like, okay, what. What is the number that will make this worth it for me when it comes up? Because it’s a lot of time. It’s not just is something going to come up in your own life, but also, you know, if you’re sick, you still got to show up and you’ve got to bring your A game because they’re not going to do it again. And so that’s a really big impact. And then having the intelligence of your own life, to be able to shift that and say, okay, I can now weigh in as an industry expert and a coach, I think that’s brilliant. So when you decide in 2021 you’re going to make this shift, you’re going to step back, you’re not going to do as much client work and as many weddings, what were you hoping would change in your life? Like, what was the thing that you thought would happen?

Devon Adrianne [00:25:32]:
That’s a good question. What I was hoping that would happen. Maybe just more that I could own my own time again and just be more in control of my schedule. Which I can say that that is definitely been something that has happened and it has been glorious. Like, I have had Saturdays off where I’ve just enjoyed the day and I’m like, this is wild. I’m not serving tables or I’m not working a wedding all day, an eight to ten hour wedding on my feet, like running around like a crazy person. Um, and that is, that’s honestly so great. And then, like, being able to do things with the kids on the Saturdays too, is, has been amazing and not missing anything. Like, I’ve been able to be, you know, there for all the things, which is so, so great.

Amy Stone [00:26:24]:
That’s awesome. All right, now, flipping that question around, were there any surprise impacts that came up after you made this change? Like, did things happen that you were not expecting when you made this shift to, like, moving away from weddings?

Devon Adrianne [00:26:37]:
And yeah, there’s been several things. I almost feel as though I lost a little bit of my identity. I feel like, because I had. I felt like I built my life on being a portrait and wedding photographer. Like, that was kind of like what I was known for. And I started like, when I was younger, before I took up this profession. Like, I didn’t really have anything that I was necessarily, like, super proud of, like, to call of, like, what I had done, you know, Like, I got pregnant really young, I got married really young, and then I got divorced really young. And I had dropped out of college because I’d gotten pregnant and I was just a, not, not just a waitress. But I was, I hadn’t really done anything that I felt like I was really proud of. Right. Building this business, teaching myself photography. Like, I didn’t go to any classes. I was self taught. All the business side of things. Like, I basically taught myself. Like, I just learned it over the years and went to little workshops here and there that were in person in Knoxville. So like everything I felt like I had built from scratch. Like, I worked so hard to get to where I was and it just was who I was. I was really proud of all that. And then to kind of like be like, okay, I don’t want to do this. As, you know, full time as I was with the client work and the weddings and stuff, it was like, okay, well who do? Like, right.

Amy Stone [00:28:05]:
If I’m not, who am I? Right. Without this, who am I? Yeah.

Devon Adrianne [00:28:09]:
100 Shifting the mindset into like telling people, like, oh, what do you do? Like, oh, I used. I’m a, I’m a professional photographer. I’m a portrait wedding photographer. Now it’s like, I’m a coach. I’m like, am I a coach? Like, that’s so weird. So I’m still growing and it’s like when I did the same thing when I first started doing photography because you get the imposter syndrome of like, am I a photographer? I mean, I’m still like learning, I’m still growing. But yeah, I mean, I am a photographer. So now it’s like, I, I know, I know I, I know I can teach people. I know I am a coach. But like, to say that out loud, verbally, it’s like it, it’s hard. It was really hard for me because it was almost like I was starting all over again in my business.

Amy Stone [00:28:53]:
Yeah.

Devon Adrianne [00:28:54]:
And I, I kind of went into it thinking like, oh, I’ve been a professional photographer and I’m well known in the industry in my area. Going and switching gears into coaching is going to be so easy. Like, I know what I’m doing. I can do it like the back of my hand. And then switching into the education world, it was like, I don’t know what I’m doing now because this is just totally different. Marketing yourself as a coach and as an educator is completely different than as a photographer. As a photographer, you just post some pretty pictures and talk about what you offer and talk about how you love wedding days and blah, blah, blah. And people are like, oh, I love her work. I want to book her as a coach. Trying to convince new photographers that are Scared to invest in themselves and invest in their business with education because they don’t know if they’re ready yet or if they don’t have the income yet. They are, you know, struggling here and there, but they’re afraid to ask out for help. Trying to find the words, the messaging and the marketing to hit their pain points and convince them like, yes, you need a coach because you are going to reach your goals a million times faster with a coach than you are if you’re. I not have somebody on your side, you know, so I’ve had to work really, really hard over the past several years to like change my messaging, tweak it, work it.

Amy Stone [00:30:14]:
I’ve.

Devon Adrianne [00:30:15]:
This is, this new website that I have out now is been about. I started it in May and I just finished it last month or no, I went live November 1st, so this month at the time of recording this. And it’s just been a labor of love and so much knowledge and so many years of, of thought processes and tweaking of my words to convince new photographers that this is something that they need.

Amy Stone [00:30:45]:
So, so I just want to double click on that because we’re talking today about a change you made in your profession, right? And the theme behind the concept of imperfect adulting. One of the hardest things that I found to explain is people like, why are you using the word adulting? And I, I said, I’m old. I think I’m older than you. I’m 51. And I said, because this is the, this is the thing we do, this shift of who we are over and over and over again. Like you’re a kid in high school and then you shift and you enroll in college or you get a job as a. And if you lean too far into any of those things, you become a new mom. You’re a wife, and then you’re not a wife. Anytime you lean too far into one of those identities, whether it’s a career, a professional relationship, even a hobby, right? Even a hobby. Like, I’m a mountain biker, I’m a triathlete. Anytime you lean too far into one of those things, you, it’s hard to make the transition. You find yourself in that question, like, oh, well, without this, what does that even mean about me? If I’m not a photographer anymore, who am I? And if I’m not a, you know, if I’m not a wedding photographer, what does that mean about me? And so you rapid fire, went through some major changes and choices that you made growing up that led you to this, which I just want to mirror that back to you and say, it is no surprise to me listening to this, that when you were like, all right, I’m going to do this thing that matches up more with my life, you were able to pull that off because you had made similar changes before and been able to do it. So kudos to you. Feel good about that. Really, really do. We talked a little bit, we’ve talked about the change and now I’m going to ask you a question and I’m interested to hear because you sound like a very, very self reliant, independent person. And you talked about as a kid, you were the person in the house that was waking up your siblings when you were making this change. There’s two parts of this question. Who around you did you have that was supportive of you doing this? Like, what kind of support did you have around you that helped you make and the decisions? And then the next part of that question is, what support do you wish you had had?

Devon Adrianne [00:32:45]:
That is a great question. I feel like my partner now. He is very supportive of everything I do, but it’s more in like, he has no clue of what I do. He’s like, whatever you decide, I trust you because I know that you’re going to make a good decision. And he, I mean, he just, he doesn’t have the entrepreneur, an entrepreneurial mindset, you know, like, he’s always worked like a salary job for like a corporate company and he loves that. Like, he enjoys that. So, like, he’s very supportive in, in what I do, but he is, he’s not built that way. So he’s just, he doesn’t understand all the things that go into, like, what I do. So he’s like, you know, you do you and I trust you and if you need me, I’m here. And I’m like, great, okay, cool. Um, which is perfect for me because yes, I am a little bit more independent and I like to make my decisions and I kind of like hold strong to those decisions. I’m like, this is what I want to do and you’re not going to change my mind because I’m set on it. So whenever I said I wanted to quit weddings and go into coaching, he’s like, okay, if that’s what you want to do, whatever makes you happy. And I’m like, this is it. Okay. And then I feel like a lot of my. I have built a huge community of wedding professionals in the industry here, and so many of them were very, very supportive and like, you know, share my name with new photographers that they meet or even wedding planners that are working with new photographers will send them my way. Like, oh, you want to learn more about weddings, you can go to Devon. And I’ve had several of my photographer friends, several that I’m really, really good friends with now. Started off as new photographers that I coached and that I like, I was a mentor towards. And then we just grew into really good friends. So that’s been really, really helpful because I can also kind of like use them as like reviews and advice and like almost like an affiliate kind of because I can be like, well, we’re really good friends now. We’ve grown really close. But also when you met me, we didn’t know each other at all and I coached you to the point where you’re going, you’re full time now and working like all these weddings and just taking you know, their thoughts and like what worked for them whenever I coached them and what helped them get to where they are now has been really great. So they’ve been really supportive. I feel like having a community in your industry is, is everything.

Amy Stone [00:35:07]:
It’s important. Yeah.

Devon Adrianne [00:35:09]:
So that’s really just been everything to me. I mean my kids are supportive but they’re, you know, they’re kids, they’re kids. Whatever you want to date with.

Amy Stone [00:35:18]:
Exactly. So what kind of support do you wish you had had? Looking back, what would have been helpful? If you can think of anything, if there is anything.

Devon Adrianne [00:35:29]:
I don’t, I don’t think there’s really been anything that’s really, that I’ve kind of missed. It’s. I’m a, like I said earlier, I’m a type 2 on the Enneagram. So like I’m the helper and I’m the one that likes to help people. So it’s hard for me to always ask for help. So maybe just having more type 2 friends in my community that just offer help to me without me having to ask for it because okay, that’s, that’s my struggle. I think, you know, I am pretty self sufficient and I’m very motivated and I’m very determined and I’m hardworking. But the type 2 in me, if I struggle, doesn’t like to ask for help always because I don’t know, I just feel like, no, I can do it on my own or it’s fun, I’ll figure it out. And I think that the type. Yeah. That type 2 is just really kind of been the downfall a little bit here and there on getting me to where I really need to be or want to be in this coaching industry.

Amy Stone [00:36:31]:
Very good. All right, so I love this story. I think that making a professional shift is realistically something that most people are going to do more than once in their life, whether it’s changing employers, retooling with a totally new profession, going back to school, any of the things that happen. And I think that we under prepare for it because. Yeah, sorry.

Devon Adrianne [00:37:01]:
I just want to. Before I forget you’re saying this and it’s so true, and I feel like it is especially true for creatives.

Amy Stone [00:37:09]:
Sure.

Devon Adrianne [00:37:10]:
If you’re in a creative world because we get really burnt out on one thing, if we do the same thing over and over again as a. In that mindset. So I think it’s important for creatives to keep in mind that it is okay to shift, it’s okay to pivot. If you’re unhappy doing whatever it is that you’ve been doing, it’s okay to pivot. Like, it was okay for me to not take weddings anymore, even though I knew it was going to be a pay cut. I knew it was going to be, you know, less money yearly or monthly or whatever it was because weddings were such good income. But it was. It was something I had to do for my mental health and for my kids, so.

Amy Stone [00:37:50]:
Very good. All right, so we’re going to do a couple of questions to wrap up. Before we do that, though, I want to let people know how they can find you. You let it drop that you’re in Knoxville, Tennessee. That’s where my favorite handbag designer is from. Patricia Nash.

Devon Adrianne [00:38:06]:
You know the brand, who she is? Yes.

Amy Stone [00:38:08]:
Right. You know the brand. It’s a great year in my life because she now has stores in the airport so, like, I can buy my stuff from her, like, while I travel, which is like a great fun thing anyway, where people can find you at your website. You’ve got a new website that’s up now. It’ll definitely be up when people see this. Tell us about what you do and give them your new website address, which will be in the email that everybody gets and in the show notes.

Devon Adrianne [00:38:32]:
Yes, it is very easy. It’s devanadrian.com and it is a photography coaching website. So there’s going to be offers that range all over. There’s private coaching. Then there’s also a shop that has, you know, digital downloads and freebies and things like that. So it is great for any. Anybody who’s starting out in photography and they have a little money or they have money that they’re ready to invest.

Amy Stone [00:39:03]:
Perfect. All Right. So this is this so devonadrian.com and we will. Because there’s a bunch of different ways to spell Devon and there’s a bunch of different ways spell Adrian. So it’s in the show notes and in the email if you’re a subscriber. All to wrap this up, I’m going to ask you three questions. 1, 2, 3. These are supposed to be rapid fire. They’re just for fun. They’re not about anything important. And the challenge is to try and answer them in, like, just a couple of words. So far, 100% of the people have failed at that. But that’s fine because it’s our show, our rules. Okay.

Devon Adrianne [00:39:31]:
I’m pretty wordy.

Amy Stone [00:39:33]:
No problem. That’s why I give you the pass that everybody else has done the same thing. Okay, so do you like movies? And if so, do you have a favorite comedy movie?

Devon Adrianne [00:39:43]:
I would say I like movies. I don’t love movies. And my favorite comedy movie. I don’t know that I have one.

Amy Stone [00:39:51]:
Okay, all right. So you don’t have one. It’s a hard question. It’s a hard question.

Devon Adrianne [00:39:54]:
That is.

Amy Stone [00:39:55]:
All right, now this question I love even more because you used to not have these. It’s a lazy Saturday morning. Nothing on the to do list. It’s raining or snowing, so it’s a homebound kind of day. Are you catching up on housework, making a lovely breakfast with your family, or sleeping in and being lazy?

Devon Adrianne [00:40:16]:
Sleeping in but not too, too late. Maybe like 9:00. Ish. And then reading on the couch under a blanket with a cup of coffee and my dogs.

Amy Stone [00:40:27]:
Nice. All right, very good. What is the first, as in earliest, like when you were a youngest world news event that you remember?

Devon Adrianne [00:40:40]:
Probably 9, 11. That’s probably the first one. That’s really sticks out of my head.

Amy Stone [00:40:44]:
Yeah, that’s the. That’s one of those where were you win.

Devon Adrianne [00:40:47]:
Yeah.

Amy Stone [00:40:47]:
Kind of things. Exactly. All right, thank you very much, Devon. This has been fantastic. And I want to say thank you for being a guest on the Imperfect Delting podcast.

Devon Adrianne [00:40:55]:
Thank you for having me.